Story Published:
Jun 9, 2010 at 5:52 PM CST
Story Updated:
Sep 24, 2010 at 4:31 PM CST
A reference to Amy Vanderbilt and etiquette could send the mildly interested to straight into a Google search. Who's that? What's etiquette about, anyway?
For those of us that remember, and care, about things thoughtful, the digital world in which we find ourselves presents some interesting dilemmas.
How can you be both considerate and plugged in? According to experts like Jodi Smith (Author of From Clueless to Class Act: Manners for the Modern Woman) there are a few guidelines to live by.
The Earbud Question
For instance, what if you have earbuds in (or blue tooth or other in-ear device) and run into a friend. Should you take one of them out to listen to your friend or both or just turn off the device and leave them be? Smith says "yes -- take them both out if you're having more than a two minute conversation."
Other experts agree -- who wants to talk with someone who may or may not be listening? Taking them both out is a signal that you're tuning into the present company. It seems an act of connection to strip off the technology.
On Checking In at a Friend's
What about checking your email or Facebook at a friend's house? The author of Send: Why People Email So Badly and How to Do It Better, Will Schwalbe, has a good piece of advice --- "Think of your PDA as a crossword puzzle. Anywhere it's acceptable to work on a crossword puzzle, it's OK to check your PDA" .... or email...
We think of it like talking on the phone at a friend's house --- if it's necessary, o.k. But keep it very short. Otherwise, why did you come to your friend's house, anyway?
On the need for speed....in email response
You're in a professional position. How quickly should you be responding to those work emails? How about the personal ones?
Here, the experts say that speed really counts. The expectations have become quite high for immediate response with today's society. If you can't respond quickly, use your "out-of-office" or automatic response setting so that people know you're out of pocket.
Students today expect teachers to respond within hours, rather than days, to their emails. Many managers have the same expectation. The important thing is to be clear about what people can expect from you...
In general...
Typing, texting, or other forms of digital mult-tasking are just a little..... hmmm.....rude when in the presence of others. We want to stay connected, and, at the end of the day it seems a little counter-productive to miss the connection in front of you in favor of the one asking for your location.
But that's just our opinion. What are your thoughts?
